I was pleasantly surprised the other day when my beloved husband expressed how he understood my reasons for being "me"...hmm.....
You may think this sound odd but all my life I've always felt like someone who doesn't belong...someone who hides in the corner and lets the world continue while she looks on.
One of my best friends who is a party lover texted me if I wanted to go over for Iftaar plus Diner party with three of her friends.
But....even though I love her to bits....I declined her invitation.
My unsociable personality is sometimes the bane of my life but it's just who I am...
I can't help being like this and I don't want to change.
hmm....I enjoy being me.
Sometimes...when I'm feeling isolated...I'd like to be invited to a party and accept the invitation... but I know I won't go and that's most likely why I never get invited anywhere.
And now I never complain about not being invited...people know me....they seem to understand.
My beloved husband....on the other hand....is very sociable and he loves partying....socializing and making new friends.
That's the way he is.
When I told him about me declining my friend's invitation to join in the fun…he said...."that doesn't matter....you're a loner. We'd be boring if we were all the same."
I enjoy being a loner. I've always been one.
hmmm...my online life is so different to my personal one.
Many people I talk to online assume I'm confident...chatty....someone with a big personality....but in reality I'm totally different.
I have one or two friends who shake their heads at me....in a nice way...but I can see what they're thinking.
I'm lucky though....because those friends understand me.
And now it seems....after 4 years....so does my beloved husband...hmmm....
Contextual Notes to 'Smoke & Mirrors' - 'Smoke & Mirrors', (*A New Ulster*). Some notes were omitted from the book *About Time: Poems & Adaptations 1993 - 2012* due to the length of the ones that...
2 weeks ago